


Feels like crying

by Laila_2802



Series: Tommy's (really not good) college life [4]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Slight trigger warning, author projecting on tommy, chill evenig hangout with the family, he deals very poorly with them, minor panik attak, talk about depression and anxiety, they are family, tommy has some thoughts and feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-19
Updated: 2020-12-19
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:07:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28177362
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Laila_2802/pseuds/Laila_2802
Summary: Tommy has some feelings and thoughts one evening while watching a movie with his family.--------------------This is part of a series but it not nessessary to read all parts,thismight be good to read to understand the family dinamics.
Series: Tommy's (really not good) college life [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2057793
Comments: 1
Kudos: 57





	Feels like crying

**Author's Note:**

> I'm totally just projecting my current feelings onto Tommy and I'm deeply sorry.   
> This is based purely on me so it might not be acurate for everyone.
> 
> There are meniones of depression and anxiety,if thet makes you uncomfortable I recomend not reading this.

Sitting here with his family in the living room, Tommy can't really concentrate on the tv.  
His two older brothers are enthusiasticly talking about something while their father trys to follow the movie. A few minutes ago Tommy was talking with them but somehow he can't think of more replies so his brothers moved on. 

Timmy's mind is everywhere and nowhere at the same time and he feels so unbelievable cold even though the living room is warm, cozy and he's lying under a blanket but his arms shiver, his legs feel weird and he feels jittery. And it bothers him, a lot.  
He feels like his breath comes shallow but he's breathing at a normal rate. His heartbeat also feels wrong somehow. 

He realizes that he should probably talk about it, they all would listen. But they are already talking and all of them look so content, Tommy doesn't want to bother them. It will probably go away tomorrow, it always does. 

Tommy's not sure what 'it' is and he really doesn't want to find out.  
That's not quite right, he's not stupid, he knows what 'it' is but he rather not think about it. Everytime he searched 'it' up on Google it said something along the lines of "anxiety" or "depression" 'it' being "panic attacks". Timmy choose not to think that that is what is wrong with him.  
He knows all the people on the internet with depression or anxiety, he doesn't want to be associated with them, he's not like that he's not. 

Tommy remembers that he still has some school work to do, also his latest video needs the last bit of editing.  
Tommy feels like crying. 

Subtly he slides closer to Phil and they cuddle a little, and Tommy tries to fall asleep.  
He knows it's not better tomorrow but still a better option than to deal with it now, and maybe he will talk to Phil someday.


End file.
